This ispart 1我的5-part serieson how to move on from a relationship.
- Part 1:我如何从一个心碎——第1部分:我的吗ney With Love
- Part 2:How I Moved On From a Heartbreak – Part 2: Heartbreak and Sadness
- Part 3:我如何摆脱心碎 - 第3部分：宽恕，封闭和继续前进
- Part 4:Top 12 Signs It’s Time To Move On From A Relationship
- Part 5:10 Steps To Move On From a Relationship
My Journey With Love
(Published on Mar 8, 2010)
“要知道是否要成为您的东西，请放开它。如果返回，那一直是您的。如果不是这样，那永远不会是。”- Celestine Chua
Today’s entry is going to be my deepest sharing here to date. All along, I have shared many personal stories such as mypast disappointment, mypast emotional stinginess,我如何与十年的最好的朋友分道扬等等。今天，我以某种从未这样做的方式向您开放。我让您进入我的秘密一面，我只向我最亲密的朋友展示。
I’m not sure if you have noticed, but I barely discuss my love life here. It’s a part of me that I have zealously kept safeguarded all this while. Out of my 140 entries so far, I have covered almost every topic but love (save for one entry I wrote in 2009on singlehood).
但是，今天我会与您，锁，库存和枪管共享这一点。事实是，我的爱情旅程并不顺利。五年前有一个我喜欢的人，我称之为G. G.是我真正喜欢的第一个人。但是，事情没有解决，我一生中第一次伤心了。在接下来的几年中，我因这种经历而下意识地阻止了我。在过去的一年中，我终于清理了这个行李，治愈了内心的伤口，并使自己从过去摆脱了。
我一直想写这篇文章，现在我觉得时间已经到了。我之所以分享这一点，是因为我知道你们中至少有一个人会从中受益。当您阅读本文时，我衷心希望您能为自己带走一些东西。
This unveils the delicate and softer side of me, different from the usual go-getter Celes you see on the blog. But it’s me all the same — a me that has always been there, but you haven’t known about till today. :)
Seeking My Soulmate
从小就一直是一个顽固的浪漫主义者。无论是看节目，戏剧还是玩游戏，我总是最喜欢爱情故事。我很高兴看到角色相遇，彼此相爱，并克服试验和磨难在一起。主要领导将永远有一个特别的人 - 一个为他/她坚持的知己，他的感情坚定不移，并将全部献给他/她所爱的人。他们的爱情故事将永远导致幸福的结局。观看这些展开总是一个美丽的经历。
除了通过这些节目和游戏经验丰富的爱情之外，我还想找到我的灵魂伴侣，我可以与之联系的特别人。虽然我一直是坚强，独立的女孩，但我一直有一部分人想受到爱，保护和照顾。随着我长大后，我找不到与我想要的那个人相匹配的人。我的关系持续了几周，仅此而已。我遇到了新人，偶尔会约会，但我对他们不感兴趣。
但是，我一直希望我的知己在那里，我会及时见到他。
Knowing G
I think it was during my second year in university, 2004, when I first met G. I was 20 then. We had a couple of classes together and ended up as projectmates in one of them. Many of my first few encounters with him were hazy. What I distinctly recall was I totally did not consider him a potential romantic interest. This was such an irony on hindsight.
Our friendship started like any other. We worked together in projects and met in classes. We occasionally ran into each other on the campus. When we did, we would hang out to chat, getting to know each other in the process. Because of our positive experience working together, we arranged to take more modules together in the next semester.
越来越近
During the next semester, with three of five modules together, we saw each other more frequently. We would always sit next to each other in class. During class, we would write and pass notes to each other — notes that were sometimes relevant to the class and many times, not. Outside of class, we would meet up for project work. A large portion of our time on campus was spent with each other. When we were out of campus, we would be in contact via email, sms or chat. Our friendship gradually evolved from one of normal friends, to good friends, to very good friends.
当我更好地了解他时，他给他留下了深刻的印象。他非常聪明，有能力，很容易成为当时认识的最聪明的人之一。他在老师和学生中都以其最高成绩而被判处。我们从智力上点击了我无法与他人在一起的方式。为了他的能力和成就，他非常谦虚。在被问到之前，他从不谈论他们，即使那时他也不会说太多。他的好意也赢得了我的胜利。他有一颗金色的心。我从来没有想过他对任何人都表达了负面意图。
To top it off, G would treat me in a special way. He was very sweet to me. He would always be carrying my stuff for me, rain or shine, whether it was my books or my laptop. When I was down and out, he was there with me, listening and supporting in a quiet manner. There were several incidences when I felt frustrated, and he would be patiently hearing me out. I was moved by his patience and kindness. I began to open up to him more and more.
Developing Feelings
G对我的行为不仅仅是“好朋友”。他所做的事情，他说的话，他周围的行为。我绝对知道行为是美好的行为与浪漫的行为之间的区别。那时，我已经与男人建立了几个非常良好的友谊，他们对我的行为可以描述为“好”和“关怀”，但绝对不是浪漫的。
G显然是更向我的行为和言语romantic than platonic, and different from how he acted toward other girls too. When we talked, he hinted about liking me, saying things such as how he liked looking at me, how I was “his Celes,” that he felt “jealous” when I mentioned other guys, and the like. Whenever we were together, I could feel his attention was focused on me, to the extent it made me feel weird. He made promises, such as to respond to any communication from me within 24 hours, no matter how busy he was. He said no matter what happened, he would never let me get hurt. And so on.
Because of that, I really thought G liked me. I talked about him with several of my close friends, both girls and guys, and they unanimously agreed. This hypothesis was sealed when a trusted friend between me and G confirmed that.
To be honest, I was really flattered. I thought G was an incredible person. I really felt he was. For him to like me — I didn’t even know what exactly he saw in me. I had never tried to hide myself when I was with him. As a result, he had seen some of my worst sides, some of which I wasn’t exactly proud of. I was boisterous, hot-headed, blunt, inconsiderate, self-centered, critical, and judgmental. He, on the other hand, was kind, caring, smart, capable, calm, composed, charismatic, patient, gentlemanly, sweet — the list could go on and on.
Yet at the same time, I felt we were very compatible. While I was the Type A, fiery and go-getter girl, he was the calm and cool-headed dude who balanced me out. We were both driven and competent in our own rights, always setting goals and achieving them. We were both accomplished individuals, be it in academics or otherwise. In university, we were迪恩·莱斯特（Dean Listers），积极参与学校间比赛/活动，经常被邀请参加顶级学生的独家活动，并将我们的期货与顶级公司密封。He was pretty much what I was looking for — in many ways, more.
I thought I had finally found my灵魂伴侣and began to fall for him. I thought I could finally start my love story. Little did I know that I was in for a heartbreak later on.
继续进行Part 2: Heartbreak and Sadness
This ispart 1我的5-part serieson how to move on from a relationship.
